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Man rides motorcycle into the afterlife

Man rides motorcycle into the afterlife

This 22-year-old Puerto Rican man was shot to death two weeks ago. So why is he on a motorcycle?

According to AutoBlog’s coverage of David Morales Colón’s unique wake, this is how he was displayed by the Marin Funeral Home in San Juan. The motorcycle, a gift from his uncle, was delivered by family members.

I’ve watched enough “Six Feet Under” that I don’t want to know how they pinned him in that position.

When I die, I’d like to be on display in front of my computer typing something on facebook … how about you?

17 Comments

  • Hahahaha… okay, that’s weird.

    When I die, I want to have my arms cut off so I look like Venus (either de Milo or Willendorf, depending on how old I am when I die).

  • Did they bury the motorcycle with him? That was my question. I guess not, I gather from the article that it was just displayed this way for the wake. They did do a good job making him look lifelike. And yeah, I don’t want to know how.

  • Also, way to go family for (if he asked for it) doing it his way. I think it’s a lovely tribute.

  • This reminds me of that Alice Walker story about Uncle Somebody who was taxidermified into some butler statue to punish his family for being uppity.

    I think we are going to go full-circle from big-ass, over-the-top, Baby-Boomer-wedding-type funerals to the simple home-death respecting of each individual’s wishes.

    I’m going to be buried under the cherry tree in my backyard.

  • I will be cremated. preservation and burial is morbid and idiotic to me. buried without preservation or casket would be fine, but not allowed in this country. The God I know does need any spec of this body to recreate it. If so desired, it just will be.

    • I used to work in the funeral industry (cemetery), but I’m no expert. I believe that there are provisions in most (if not all states) which allow burial without preservation but there is a strict time limit before interment. I’m assuming you are talking about the US. I don’t know how it is anywhere else.

      I’m not certain, but I believe that many people buried in Jewish cemeteries are not embalmed. Caskets are mandatory everywhere that I know of, however, though vault regulations differ by municipality and individual cemetery rules.

      Modern human bodies carry lots of diseases. One of the purposes of the casket is to shield your remains from the water table until after some of the longer lived viruses such as hepatitis have ceased their life cycle. A body is dead, but many critters inside it may live on for a while. The protection the casket affords is uncertain (it really depends on cemetery activity such as tractors and backhoes driving across it, and interment in neighboring plots.)

      I don’t mean to be morbid, but those caskets they “guarantee will last forever” often don’t.

    • Really, who is going to check to see if they got their money’s worth on that guarantee?

    • Oh MAN, you want to talk about morbid, think about the cemeteries in New Orleans. They’re barely a few inches above water level, and whenever it rains, everything floats up… so they’re buried in those above-ground things, right?

      But here’s the nasty part: some of those things have chutes that open up in the back, so when you want to bury a new body, you can take old ones out the other side. OR they just wait til someone is sufficiently decayed, then cram their remains in a corner to fit someone else in.

    • Floating caskets actually happen in nearly every cemetery. Down in New Orleans, they have the added problem that they sometimes float away…

    • That’s my favorite part of New Orleans: the cemeteries. And all the voodoo shit that permeates it. And the food is pretty good too. (Or at least was.)

    • Thanks for widening the perspective on the situation Rosencrantz. I suppose the older style wooden casket could have been sufficient to contain a body and it’s bugs before it all “returned to the earth,” and our water supply.

      I hear you Insane. Preservation, other than allowing distant relatives to make it in time to see your physical body before you’re buried, doesn’t make much sense to me. And even needing to see someone’s body one last time is a bit, well, off the mark. I mean, who did we care about? The side of beef or the awesome character? If we were close enough to someone to feel the need to “see” them one last time, wouldn’t the memory and photos of good times be sufficient? They live on in our hearts.

      Really, I think the whole thing is a conspiracy by the Zombie cultists to ensure PLENTY of Zombies come Zombie Apocalypse Day. This is serious y’all, note the Capitalization? ;-)

  • I’ve made it clear to my family that I prefer cremation and not to have a religious service at all, and no religious symbols should be at any eulogy, but really I won’t care what they do at that point.

  • Oh man, I didn’t want to get tempted to go for my home-funeral bull-horn. I’ll save it for a future post.

    Jessica, that’s sad. And scary. Heartbreaking you had to see that.

    The very first funeral I went to was an elder on the _____ Reservation who was also a relative. The mature women washed and dressed the body. The men and boys cleared a space in the yard. The strongest young men dug a hole while everyone stood or knelt and prayed and then they all covered it up with dirt. The kids walked around and around, ‘putting her to sleep’ and singing songs and laying flowers. (I got to stand in the road, shooing away stray buffalo calves.) This was my lasting impression of what a funeral was until I grew up and went to a mortuary. The cremation chamber….the horror, the horror. Better to do it at home or a Viking ship.

    Insane – excellent point. So glad you brought it up http://www.funerals.org/newsandalerts/consumer-alerts/471-caringownlynchresponse

    • I believe that in many rural counties, or areas of rural counties, any property functioning as an active ranch and zoned as such, an have a family cemetery on site. That and a trash dump …

  • cremation causes a pretty severe environmental impact due to the pollution from the smoke stacks and the fact that the heavy metals in bodies (mercury fillings anyone?) are vaporized and put into the atmosphere.

    there are places that offer green burials and they generally bury you in a cardboard casket with no embalming and usually no marker. it is a great way to preserve open space and provide habitat for critters.

    a great book on the topic is grave matters: a journey through the modern funeral industry to a natural burial. website here http://www.gravematters.us

    • Hey Carrie! Ew, I never thought about the pollution from burning bodies but it makes sense… personally I always wanted to be cremated, but that makes me think twice.

      Argh. I might do it anyway, sustainability be damned.

  • There’s a song by the Hackensaw Boys called “Box of Pine”, and that’s how I want to return to the Earth. Simple, quiet, no marker, not that big of a deal, continuing the cysle. My shell is gone but I’m sure *I’ll* be around lurking somewhere.

    Or barring that, I want my friends to eat me. Straight up. Filet my asscheek and pass the tongue. Wonder who’s got dibs on my heart? Mmmm…

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